2019

Hey 2019! You’ll be great this year, I feel it.

Backtracking to what happened in 2018, everything happened so fast and it’s now such a blur to me. I wish I documented down my thoughts and feelings more - which will allow me to see how far I’ve grown through the tough times. While the memory is still somewhat there, I’ll like to jot down things I remember.

At the start of the year, gave my trust to someone but the person misplaced it. gave the benefit of the doubt and continued trusting.

was busy with work, life, juggling friends, love. It was tough. Could already feel things falling apart but still wanted to trust the process

April 2018 - with whatever hope I had, I allowed things to be and still hussled. Then, it just completely shattered. Following the shattering, God had to shatter it once more. My world became such a dark place.

Don’t really feel like continuing for now. But life was such a blur, healing and managing everything. I didn’t even realize how different things have become at the end of 2018.

For better? Or for worse? Acceptance?

One of those days.

Hello blog. It’s just one of those days again, mm bad days. 

Because of wanting people to stop worrying, escaping feels like the best option. Escape where? 

They say there are three steps - to take responsibility for your actions, feel sorry for yourself, then forgive yourself and get over it. Will this day ever come?

November thoughts

This year I had a very special feeling. The feeling of looking at someone and thinking , who are you? Who were you? Did I exactly know you? It’s such a weird feeling because the true friendships and valued people in my life had always stayed with me. I guess things evolve as we grow older, things simply change. And me as a 24 ish 25 year old, am trying to grasp with that change. No one really likes changes and the unknown do we? Especially when everything seemed like it was going fine, going good. and when things starts crashing down, you realize you cannot deal with it. 

This doesn’t just apply to a relationship with some partner, but also, a friend, a family member, a colleague, your passion, or interest. Something or someone you’ve never thought you’ll drift away from. 

As someone told me, you feel devastated because you lost your hopes and dreams. And yes you grief. 

Just a very random thought I’ve had today. Half drowsy from my flu meds.

Love,

Aggy